Nearly three years after filing for divorce from her husband Jay Barker — who was arrested months later for allegedly attempting to run her over with his truck — singer-songwriter Sara Evans has revealed the two are back together.
During the first episode of her new podcast, “Diving in Deep with Sara Evans,” the country star opened up about her past tumultuous relationship with her husband of 15 years, the events that led up to his arrest and how the two were able to rekindle their romance.
“The thing that scares me about today [is] saying something that I might regret or saying something that might embarrass my children or annoy my family,” Evans said before diving into the “question on everybody’s mind.”
“A lot of women will judge me and want to judge me. … We’re so happy now, but I don’t want anyone to think that I’m advocating staying in a relationship where you are ever, in your gut, you know that you need to exit the situation,” she said. “Every woman needs to follow her gut on that and do what is best for her. I believe and I hope that I’ve done that.”
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Sara Evans and Jay Barker attend an Eagles concert at the Grand Ole Opry House in Nashville, Tennessee, on Oct. 29, 2017. (Rick Diamond/Getty Images)
Evans, who initially separated from Barker in 2020 after a “really bad fight that was preceded by many bad fights,” said her husband became “addicted to being the boss” of her. “It was a one-sided, volatile relationship with a lot of passion,” added Evans, who admitted they were “using abuse” in their marriage.
In January 2022, the duo met up for lunch, but things took a turn for the worse when Barker “wasn’t getting his way.”
“He wanted me to be the usual Sara and do whatever he wanted. … He got really upset,” she recalled.
Later that evening, Evans — who went to a bonfire at a neighbor’s house with one of her daughters — said Barker was “texting her all night” blaming her for “breaking up the family.”
Singer-songwriter Sara Evans appears at Build Studio in New York City to discuss her album ‘Words’ and her tour on Dec. 6, 2017. (Desiree Navarro/WireImage)
“It really scared me, and it scared all of us, especially my child that was with me,” she said on the podcast. “So the friend of ours was driving me. We were getting ready to pull into the driveway, and … he had a verbal altercation with my child, who had never seen that side of him, ever. And it scared the s— out of her.
“Then he jumped in his truck, and he [was] sort of backing up at a very high speed. I knew Jay, so I didn’t feel the same way that my child felt. My child thought he was gonna plow our car down, that he was backing up towards our car, and that she was about to watch something horrific, or at the very least, an accident, which would have been his truck hitting my side of the car, where I was in the front seat. She was terrified.”
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Evans’ daughter called 911 right away before Barker sped away.
“My child was more upset than I was because I had been privately been having these experiences with Jay for 14 years. It was a first for her to see her dad like that,” she said.
Sara Evans poses at the 2023 CMA Awards. (Getty Images)
Eventually, Barker returned to the home and was arrested on scene.
“I just felt so ashamed and so stupid, and my child was so mad,” she said.
Evans said she thought this was the “end of her marriage” to Barker and “couldn’t function.”
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“I was just getting call after call after call after call, and I was like, ‘I cannot believe this is happening to me and my children again. I’ve lost the love of my life,'” she said. “To me, he’s just gorgeous, he’s funny, we have so much in common. We feel the same about everything, raising kids, family structures, politics, religion, everything. We just love each other. We’re best friends.”
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A few months later, Barker reached out to Evans via text and the duo slowly began rekindling their relationship under a couple of conditions: the two attend therapy and marriage counseling “for the rest” of their lives.
“I just did not want to divorce again and start over,” she said. “I just pictured myself being alone and missing him and thinking, ‘We could’ve tried harder.’ But it took me filing for divorce, I think, for him to realize, ‘Oh s—, she’s serious. This is it.’”
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“Some people have marriage problems that are like, they fight all the time. We didn’t fight all the time. He fought me. When he was in his low spots, he fought against me, he pushed me away, pushed my love away. So every situation is different. I would never encourage anybody to stay in a dangerous situation,” she said.
Evans’ upcoming album “Unbroke” is set to be released June 7.